I Can See It Now
by iceandfire105
Summary: A series of unrelated Duncney oneshots, all based off an individual Taylor Swift song. Some will be AU. All rights belong to their respective owners. Cover image doesn't belong to me.
1. You're Not Sorry

_**You're Not Sorry**_

Courtney hugged her legs in tight to her chest, sitting with her back up against the seat. She had nothing to do, and she had exhausted list-making in the last half hour. First Class was lit dimly by the lights underneath the bar, showing that the clock read 2:44. The rest of the Amazons had passed out all of four hours ago, and the unusual lack of turbulence had helped that. But she couldn't sleep. The pain coming from the empty hole in her chest was too much.

She had been stupid – _so_ stupid – to trust that criminal. Because that was what he was. A criminal. Criminals don't care about others, quite frankly, they come and go as they please, leaving a trail of destruction in their wake. And Courtney had been stupid to ignore that. She had been stupid to ignore everything that screamed _run!_ She had thought that she could change that aspect of him and avoid the burn. But she was wrong. She was always wrong nowdays.

_All this time I was wasting hoping you would come around._

_I've been giving out chances every time and all you do is let me down._

_And it's taken me this long baby, but I figured you out._

_And you're thinking we'll be fine again, but not this time around._

He cheated. He freaking _cheated._ And she never saw it coming. She should have seen the signs. She should have read the writing on the wall. The writing that was so _blatantly obvious_.

And he was saying that he was sorry. He was practically begging her to forgive him. But she knew that he didn't really care. He wasn't sorry.

_You don't have to call anymore, I won't pick up the phone._

_This is the last straw - don't wanna hurt anymore._

_And you can tell me that you're sorry, but I don't believe you baby like I did before._

_You're not sorry, no no, no oh._

He had pleaded with those teal eyes of his, looking straight into her own brown ones. She might have believed him if Tyler hadn't seen the truth. She would give him another chance, but he had spent the number she had given him. He wasted everything.

_Looking so innocent, I might believe you if I didn't know._

_Could've loved you all my life if you hadn't left me waiting in the cold._

With a small exhale, she stood up. She needed to go for a walk; get a change of scenery. She left through the door and paced down the hallway. She paused outside of the door where the other team was. She could hear the rumble of steady breathing inside. Duncan was in there, she realised. The thought made her breathing irregular, and she shook her head to clear it. Letting out another breath, she stepped through another doorway to the Elimination Room. It was eerily dark, and the gentle hum of the engine on the other side of the plane pulsed through the walls. Courtney looked over to where a large number of costumes and props had been carelessly dumped. Twitching her nose slightly, she walked over into the midst of it all and plopped down, out of view from the door. The material was cool and rather refreshing compared to the air-conditioned climate of First Class. She actually quite liked it. Maybe this would take her mind off things. Or if it didn't, she could probably think better.

_And you've got your share of secrets, and I'm tired of being last to know._

_And now you're asking me to listen, 'cause it's worked each time before._

The sound of a door creaking open made her jump. Her heart pounding in her ears, she shrunk back into her nest of costumes, hoping that no one was coming in. Everything was silent for a while, then gentle footsteps paced across the floor, coming closer to her. She crossed her fingers hoping, praying that they didn't find her.

'Princess?'

It seemed that her guardian angel had abandoned her this time. Her throat closed up and she tried desperately not to choke. Small spasms ran down her back, making her shake. No. She was not going to cry. Not now. Taking in a harsh breath, she looked up.

Teal. That was all she saw. Those rare, teal coloured irises, looking at her with a mixture of hostility and curiosity.

'What are you doing here?' she asked, her voice rough and forced. Then, as an afterthought, she spat out, 'Duncan.'

His eyes narrowed, and he looked at her for a while, his mouth tight. 'You know, it isn't hard to miss someone walking past your door. The floor creaks, you know.'

Courtney blinked. No, she hadn't noticed, because she was too wrapped up in her own thoughts to even care.

'You didn't answer my question.'

Duncan rolled his eyes. 'Following you. Obviously.'

'Go away.'

'Princess -'

'I _said,_ go away!'

'Courtney –'

'Oh for God's sake! Go away! I don't want to hear it!'

'Courtney, just _listen_, will you?'

_But you don't have to call anymore, I won't pick up the phone._

_This is the last straw_ - d_on't wanna hurt anymore._

_And you can tell me that you're sorry, but I don't believe you baby like I did before._

_You're not sorry, no no, no oh._

_You're not sorry no no, no oh._

Courtney took a shaky breath, and stood up. 'No. I've listened every other time, and given you _so_ many chances, and then you go and throw it all away. I'm _not _listening this time!'

Duncan grabbed both of her hands. She tried to pull them free but his grip was too strong.

'Let me _go!' _she whispered, tears smarting in her eyes.

'No,' he replied, stooping so his eyes were level with hers, and mere centimetres away. 'Not until you hear me out.'

'I don't need to hear you out! You cheated, and that's all I need to know!'

_You had me crawlin' for you honey and it never would've gone away, no._

_You used to shine so bright, but I watched all of it fade._

'First of all,' he started. 'I didn't cheat. You weren't my girlfriend at the time. I was a free agent.'

'But you know what we're like!' Courtney hissed. 'We date one day and break up the next!'

Duncan sighed. 'I know.'

'And why did it have to be weird Goth girl, of _all _people?'

He looked away. 'I'm not gonna answer that.'

'You like her more than you ever liked me, don't you?'

Duncan winced. Courtney knew she'd hit a nerve. 'Don't say that –.'

'But it's _true_, isn't it?'

'No.'

'You're lying,' she whispered. 'I know you are.'

He scratched the back of his neck, dropping one of her hands. 'I don't _know_ at the moment.'

Courtney tugged her other hand free from his grip. 'I'm going. Goodbye, Duncan.'

'Princess, wait!'

She ignored him, and started towards the door.

'Courtney!' Duncan grabbed her by the wrist and spun her around. 'It's over, isn't it? For good?'

'Obviously.'

_So you don't have to call anymore, I won't pick up the phone._

_This is the last straw - there's nothing left to beg for._

_And you can tell me that you're sorry, but I don't believe you baby like I did before._

'I'm sorry, you know.'

No, he wasn't.

He ran a thumb over the back of her hand. 'One last kiss?'

'Wha – no –!'

He put a hand on the back of her head and kissed her; only a gentle touch of the lips. Courtney knew he'd rather be kissing Miss Gothic. With a gasp, she pulled away.

'I _hate_ you.'

'Court –'

'I _hate_ you!'

She whirled around and sprinted out of the room.

_You're not sorry, no, no, oh._

Courtney ran back into First Class, trying to hold onto her control. He couldn't come in here. With a small moan, she curled back up in her seat, burying her head in her knees. Then she let go.

_You're not sorry, no, no, oh._


	2. Mine

**So, with this one, the story is told more through the song than what I've written. I quite like this one. Please review guys!**

**Cheers!**

**~Ice.**

* * *

_**Mine**_

Courtney looked over at Duncan from the passenger's seat, a small smile playing on her lips. Her boyfriend was taking her somewhere, and he was being particularly stubborn about not telling her where. She had exhausted trying to trick him into telling her ten minutes ago, as it became evident he wasn't saying anything.

_You were in college working part time waiting tables._

_Left a small town, never looked back._

_I was a flight risk with a fear of falling, wondering why we bother with love if it never lasts._

She leaned back in her seat, watching his eyes. There was this sort of excited energy that he seemed to be trying to keep hidden. The teal was exceptionally bright, and his fingers tapped nervously on the steering wheel.

They had been gotten back together after the show, and had spent the last five years dating without any hassles. Duncan hadn't noticed any other girls, Courtney had stopped being as uptight as she used to be, and everything had worked out really, _really_ well.

_I say "Can you believe it?" as we're lying on the couch._

_The moment I can see it._

_Yes, yes, I can see it now._

The car pulled to a stop. Duncan looked over at her, finally letting the grin he had been holding back spread broadly across his face. 'Here we are, Princess.'

Courtney looked out of the front window. Spreading in front of them was a vast expanse of water. The lake was huge, and on the other side, mountains rolled and tumbled, covered in trees. The edge of the lake was covered in tiny, white pebbles. It was beautiful.

Courtney got out of the car, her eyes wide. 'Oh, my. . .'

Duncan came to stand next to her, his hands in his pockets. 'Like it?'

She nodded, practically knocked speechless.

'Best bit is,' Duncan said, 'we have this whole place to ourselves.'

_Do you remember we were sitting there by the water?_

_You put your arm around me for the first time._

_You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter._

_You are the best thing that's ever been mine._

Courtney grinned, turning and flinging her arms around him. 'It's amazing! But why?'

Duncan shrugged, slipping a hand around her waist. 'I never take you out, so I figured, why not?'

She smiled again and pecked him on the lips. 'Definitely worth it.'

_Flash forward and we're taking on the world together,_

_And there's a drawer of my things at your place._

_You learn my secrets and you figure out why I'm guarded,_

_You say we'll never make my parents' mistakes._

When they were together again, at first Courtney had been afraid of another breakup. She didn't want her life to crumble around her ears again, and she didn't want to go through what her parents did either. That divorce had changed her so much, and only having a father to live with had torn her life in half. But she was strong. She was going to hope for the best.

_But we got bills to pay - we got nothing figured out,_

_When it was hard to take, yes, yes, this is what I thought about._

She sat down beside the water. Duncan dropped down next to her. She smiled absently, watching the light reflect in ripples on the surface, and slipped her hand in his.

_Do you remember we were sitting there by the water?_

_You put your arm around me for the first time._

_You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter -_

_You are the best thing that's ever been mine._

_Do you remember all the city lights on the water?_

_You saw me start to believe for the first time._

_You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter_

_You are the best thing that's ever been mine._

Courtney knew everything was going to work out. She felt it in her subconscious. She trusted Duncan.

_And I remember that fight - two-thirty AM,_

_As everything was slipping right out of our hands._

_I ran out crying and you followed me out into the street,_

_Braced myself for the "Goodbye."_

'_Cause that's all I've ever known._

_Then you took me by surprise -_

_You said, "I'll never leave you alone."_

That moment had changed everything. Courtney knew it was going to be okay.

_You said, "I remember how we felt sitting by the water._

_And every time I look at you, it's like the first time._

_I fell in love with a careless man's careful daughter._

_She is the best thing that's ever been mine."_

Duncan got to his feet. Courtney stood up with him. 'Princess?'

'Yes?'

'Can I ask you something?'

_Hold on, make it last_

_Hold on, never turn back_

_You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter_

_You are the best thing that's ever been mine._

'Well, uh, you know I'm not good with speeches, and . . . um . . .'

Courtney smiled. Watching Duncan stutter and look nervous was one of the most adorable sights.

'You see, the thing is . . . you're the best girlfriend I could ever have. And I just wanted to ask . . .'

He started reaching for something in his jacket pocket. His hand stopped and gripped onto it. He pulled it out, concealing it in his hand.

Courtney felt her eyes widen.

'Will you marry me?'

_Do you believe it?_

_We're gonna make it now._

Courtney felt herself start blushing and grinning like crazy. She nodded, flinging her arms around his shoulders. Duncan let out a startled _oomph_, and gave a low chuckle in her ear, wrapping an arm around her waist. 'I'll take that as a yes?'

'Definitely.'

_And I can see it,_

_I can see it now. . ._


	3. Begin Again

**This is an AU Scourtney fic, however it** **reflects on Duncney. And for the record, I don't ship Scourtney. This is only in there because it fits. Just had to put that out there so I wouldn't give anyone a heart attack. **

**Cheers!**

**~Ice**

* * *

_**Begin Again**_

_Took a deep breath in the mirror._

_He didn't like it when I wore high heels, but I do._

Courtney studied her face in the mirror in her bathroom. She swept a lock of hair away from her eyes and gave a small sigh. This was the best she was going to look. She left the bathroom and picked her iPod off the kitchen bench, exiting her house through the front door.

_Turn the lock and put my headphones on._

_He always said he didn't get this song, but I do. I do._

She put the earphones in her ears, sliding into the front seat of her car. She could take the more scenic route, for once. The café was only a few blocks away, and it wasn't like she was late. She was never late.

Courtney pulled up next to a park that was only a street away, and got out. There was a bridge overlooking the river. She crossed into it and stood, leaning on the rail, watching the water. After a moment, she quickly checked the time on her PDA, and walked across the road behind her.

_Walked in expecting you'd be late._

_But you got here early and you stand and wave._

_I walk to you._

_You pull my chair out and help me in._

_And you don't know how nice that is, but I do._

Scott was . . . _different_ from Duncan had been. He was a rustic, farm-raised boy rather than a punk. He had probably been thoroughly educated in how to treat a lady, and was doing his best. As Courtney walked into the café, he grinned and waved. Courtney gave a slight smile, and made her way over to him. He said a cheerful hello and asked her about her day, leading her over to a table by a window. He pulled out her chair for her. The action surprised Courtney. Duncan _never_ did that. She wasn't sure exactly what to do. Nervously, she sat down in the chair and allowed Scott to push it back in. It was sweet of him.

_And you throw your head back laughing like a little kid._

_I think it's strange that you think I'm funny 'cause he never did._

_I've been spending the last eight months thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end._

_But on a Wednesday in a café, I watched it begin again._

Scott started some small talk, and politely asked her about her interests and hobbies. Duncan didn't do that either. He only talked about himself. He hadn't made it a priority to ask her about herself, or what she liked to do, and because of it he hardly knew her. It was no wonder she had broken up with him.

_You said you never met one girl who had as many James Taylor records as you, but I do._

_We tell stories and you don't know why I'm coming off a little shy._

_But I do._

Courtney was slightly hesitant in answering questions about herself. She felt incredibly shy at this new angle, and wasn't sure about what to do. Nevertheless, she sat her hands in her lap and replied softly. Scott laughed and rested his elbows on the table, interlacing his fingers. Courtney couldn't help grinning.

_But you throw your head back laughing like a little kid._

_I think it's strange that you think I'm funny 'cause he never did._

_I've been spending the last eight months thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end._

_But on a Wednesday in a café, I watched it begin again._

After an hour, Scott stood up and offered his arm. Courtney took it, and they left the building, walking down to the river where her car was. Scott was still talking, so her mind wandered off. She wanted to say something about Duncan. She just wanted to offhandedly mention something that let Scott know how much of a gentleman he was being compared to the criminal.

_And we walked down the block to my car and I almost brought him up,_

_But you start to talk about the movies that your family watches every single Christmas,_

_And I want to talk about that._

_For the first time what's past is past._

Just when she was about to say something, Scott started talking about what he and his family like to do at his farm. And Courtney didn't mind. Right in that moment, she finally felt that she could put Duncan behind her. She finally felt that she could safely move on. She liked Scott. A lot.

_'Cause you throw your head back laughing like a little kid._

_I think it's strange that you think I'm funny 'cause he never did._

_I've been spending the last eight months thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end._

_But on a Wednesday in a café, I watched it begin again._

They stopped at her car, and Scott opened the door for her. It was coming to an end. She smiled and said her goodbyes, but just before she got in, she gave him a kiss on the cheek. Scott grinned, and she shut the door of the car. In the rear view mirror, as she drove away, she saw him wave. Even though she knew he couldn't see, she waved back.

_But on a Wednesday in a café, I watched it begin again._


	4. Speak Now

**Back again.**

**Now, as you can see from the title, you'd probably guess what this one's about. Yes guys, Courtney's crashing a wedding. Though, being the sort of person she is, I'd imagine her charging down the aisle after Gwen rather than dealing with it in a civilised manner. However, since I was mostly going along with the song . . . I cancelled that idea. It's still funny to imagine and laugh about.**

**Cheers!**

**~Ice.**

* * *

_**Speak Now**_

_I am not the kind of girl who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion,_

_But you are not the kind of boy who should be marrying the wrong girl._

Courtney hid herself in the crowd, slipping past people with quiet 'scuse me's'. The church was stuffy and overheated, crowded with the huge number of people who had turned up. With a small huff, she fanned her face and ducked in between another set of unsuspecting guests. She was really beginning to regret wearing a pair of jeans instead of shorts, and though she wore a singlet top on her torso, the material had an annoying habit of trapping in heat. She impatiently plucked it away from her skin, letting out a small sigh of relief as the mildly cool air quickly ran up her top in a wave, refreshing her ever so slightly.

_I sneak in and see your friends and her snotty little family all dressed in pastel,_

_And she is yelling at a bridesmaid somewhere back inside a room wearing a gown shaped like a pastry._

Courtney chewed her lip in disapproval. This wasn't a _wedding_. A severe lack of thought had gone into the setup. Seriously, who has a _black_ carpet running down the aisle? Only Miss Gothy, it seemed. The problem was, it was soon to become "Mrs". But Courtney wasn't going to let it happen. The moment that Bridgette had mentioned a wedding, her brain had gone into strategy mode. She began planning this attack for weeks now. This _definitely_ wasn't a wedding. It was war.

She looked up at the altar where Duncan was waiting. It couldn't have made her happier to see that he was looking incredibly bored, staring absently around the room.

_This is surely not what you thought it would be._

_I lose myself in a daydream, where I stand and say._

_Don't say "Yes", run away now,_

_I'll meet you when you're out of the church at the back door._

_Don't wait or say a single vow,_

_You need to hear me out._

_And they said, "Speak now"._

Courtney finally made her way over to a wall and pressed herself against it. The floor was finally starting to clear up as guests began taking their seats. But she needed somewhere to hide . . .

She moved some window curtains aside with her hands and stepped up onto the sill, her boot wedging into it and keeping her stable. She kept the curtain shifted slightly so she could see what was going on.

_Fond gestures are exchanged and the organ starts to play a song that sounds like a death march._

_And I am hiding in the curtains;_

_It seems that I was uninvited by your lovely bride-to-be._

The organ began to play and instantly the church fell silent. Courtney craned her neck to see what was going on.

From nowhere, it seemed, Gwen appeared wearing (of _course_) a black wedding dress. Wasn't it bad luck to wear black to a wedding?

Courtney considered her options. She could jump Gwen now and run off like a madwoman, leaving chaos and destruction in her wake, _or_ she could bide her time and send everything crumbling down at the last minute. That seemed like the more appealing option to her.

_She floats down the aisle like a pageant queen._

_But I know you wish it was me, you wish it was me - don't you?_

Before Courtney could stop them, her eyes flickered back to Duncan for a split second. He didn't look any more interested now than he did five minutes ago. She knew that convincing herself that she didn't care about _him_ and just wanted revenge, wasn't going to work. She was aware of that. She was crashing this wedding _because _she didn't want him to marry Gwen, of all people. She could tell that he didn't want to go into this marriage either. She could read it in his face.

_Don't say "Yes", run away now,_

_I'll meet you when you're out of the church at the back door._

_Don't wait or say a single vow,_

_You need to hear me out,_

_And they said, "Speak now"._

Gwen reached the end of the aisle and stood atop the altar, opposite Duncan. The preacher began speaking, but it was all a dull hum in the back of Courtney's ears. Now she just had to wait for the right moment.

She exhaled deeply, trying to control her violently stuttering heartbeat. Seeing Duncan wasn't what was making her feel like this. No, no, no. Absolutely not. She was just . . . nervous. Yes! That was it. Nervous. She _was_ crashing a wedding in front of hundreds of people, after all. Anyone in her position would feel . . . nervous.

She chewed her lip. Why did he have to look so _fantastic_ in that suit?

No.

She wasn't here to ogle guys. She was on a mission. And crazy ex-girlfriends on missions _do not_ get distracted.

Wait. _Crazy?_ Did she seriously just call herself _crazy_? Damn it, she was losing her mind.

_Don't say "Yes", run away now,_

_I'll meet you when you're out of the church at the back door._

_Don't wait or say a single vow,_

_Your time is running out,_

_And they said, "Speak now"._

Some phrases registered vaguely in her mind, and her pulse quickened, if possible, even further. "The Perfect Moment" was close. She could feel it. She shuffled on her feet, her legs trembling.

_I hear the preacher say, "Speak now or forever hold your peace."_

_There's the silence, there's my last chance._

_I stand up with shaky hands, all eyes on me._

'If any of you has reasons why these two should not be married, speak now or forever hold your peace.'

The sentence reverberated through the room and Courtney froze, her breath hitching in her throat.

_The Perfect Moment_.

It was time.

Pushing the curtains aside fully, Courtney jumped off the sill and strode over to the middle of the carpet at the back of the room. Everyone turned and looked at her, eyes wide.

_Horrified looks from everyone in the room,_

_But I'm only looking at you._

_I am not the kind of girl who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion._

_But you are not the kind of boy who should be marrying the wrong girl._

Courtney looked up at Duncan and didn't say anything. He was looking at her, his expression somewhere between amusement and _"Oh, yes. My psychotic ex-girlfriend. Should've expected that."_

She drew in a breath. 'I know,' she started. 'I probably seem crazy. In fact, I'm worried I am. And why am I doing this, you might ask. I am aware that there couldn't be two more alike people on the planet. They seem the perfect match. And I am nothing but the ex-girlfriend who has invited herself in here. But _damn it_, I was not going to sit on the sidelines and just watch this happen. Not for anything. So, yes. I have invaded your wedding –' she shot a pointed look at Gwen, '- and I am giving myself one last chance to change things. A last chance to change your mind.

'But the thing is, I'm standing here now and I'm starting to see how utterly mad I look to you.' She fixed her eyes with Duncan's teal ones. 'I realise I'm just reinforcing how much you hate me. But all the same, I'm going to tell you that I'm sorry. For absolutely everything.' She turned and fled.

She pushed open the large double doors and stumbled into the garden outside, blinking away tears.

_Damn it_. She couldn't cry. Not now.

But, oh god, she had done it. And he definitely thought she had lost her mind. She knew her plea hadn't worked.

_So, don't say "Yes", run away now,_

_I'll meet you when you're out of the church at the back door._

_Don't wait or say a single vow,_

_You need to hear me out,_

_And they said, "Speak now"._

She needed to get away before she was chased down or something. Drawing in a shaky breath, she straightened her top and bottled up her emotions, holding her head high and trying to look calm.

_That_ lasted all of two seconds.

She choked back a sob and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. The church doors opened again and she jumped violently. She started running down the street. Her pursuer also broke into a run. Courtney skidded on the street corner at a highway and looked around wildly. Before she could run again though, a hand grabbed her wrist. A hand that was _far_ too familiar.

'I knew you were a feisty one, Princess, but I thought crashing weddings was below you.'

Courtney closed her eyes and drew in a shaky breath, preparing her response. Then his comment fully registered.

'Are – are you . . . _laughing_?'

Duncan chuckled and pulled her back beside him. 'You know,' he murmured in her ear, amusement still evident in his voice, 'I was half-hoping you'd turn up.'

'What?'

'If you haven't already noticed, I don't want to marry Gwen. It was more of a thing that my parents decided.'

Courtney raised an eyebrow incredulously. 'And you actually went _along_ with it?'

Duncan shrugged. 'Didn't get a choice.'

She processed that concept. 'So . . . you were quite happy to leave her there at the altar?'

He grinned. 'Well, someone's gotta chase down the "crazy" ex-girlfriend. And, about that.' He paused, still grinning.

'About that?' Courtney prodded.

He ruffled the top of her head playfully. 'I _knew_ you still cared!'

Courtney flushed a heavy shade of magenta. 'I did n– I do _not_! I just . . . I just . . .'

'Didn't want me to marry Gwen?'

'Erm . . .'

He pulled her into his chest, laughing. 'Well, I don't think that wedding's past the point of being called off. Whaddya say about running away now? Just us.'

Courtney looked up at him. 'Well . . .'

'Come on, Princess. Live a little.'

And for the first time in a long time, a grin split Courtney's face. 'Just us?'

'Just us.'

'Then I think you've got yourself a deal.'

He laughed, and leaned down to kiss her. Courtney didn't object and wrapped her hands around his neck, smiling slightly.

Duncan pulled away, grinning again. 'Damn, I'm glad you were around at right then.'

_And you'll say "Let's run away now,_

_I'll meet you when I'm out of my tux at the back door._

_Baby, I didn't say my vows,_

_So glad you were around when they said, "Speak now"._


	5. The Way I Loved You

**Gah! I took _so_ long!**

**Okay. Maybe it was only a week. But still. It felt like an eternity to me. Besides, since it had been a week since I'd updated two of my stories, and _two_ weeks since I've updated my main one, I've got it worked into my stream that I'm severely behind. Side effects of being an intense writer, I guess.**

**Anyways, lots of love goes out to Lauren Andrea, for suggesting this song. :)**

**Cheers!**

**~Ice.**

* * *

_**The Way I Loved You**_

Courtney said goodbye and hung up the phone. With a small exhale, she sat it on her bedside table and looked out the window at the night sky.

_He is sensible and so incredible, and all my single friends are jealous._

_He says everything I need to hear and it's like I couldn't ask for anything better._

She and Scott had been dating for a few weeks now. After the show, she had managed to get it into his head that it wasn't her fault she had been kissed by another guy. She had made sure to use terms like "assaulted". Somehow, those sorts of words registered in his vocabulary.

While she was at it, she also explained the "list" business. She pointed out that she was just playing the game. No one could blame her for that. Thankfully, Scott forgave her and took her back. That relieved Courtney some.

_He opens up my door and I get into his car and he says "You look beautiful tonight."_

_And I feel perfectly fine._

He still made a point to tell her he loved her on a frequent basis. Granted, that made her pink cheeked and happy, but she felt she was lacking something. She wasn't sure she wanted to allow _herself _to love . . . again.

Duncan was the only person she had ever loved. He was the only person she had begun to trust with almost every fibre of her being. He was the only person she could be fighting with one minute then be kissing the next.

_But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain,_

_And it's 2am and I'm cursing your name._

_You're so in love that you act insane and that's the way I loved you._

_Stop it_, she scolded herself. _You like Scott more than you could ever love that delinquent_. A nagging voice in the back of her mind started to argue, but she silenced it. _No. Duncan is a criminal who likes nothing more than to migrate between people like a nomad. Scott will stay with you. You know that._

The voice began protesting again. With a growl, Courtney stood up and turned on the radio. The music started to block out her train of thought.

She hadn't heard this song before.

_Breaking down and coming undone - it's a roller coaster kind of rush,_

_And I never knew I could feel that much,_

_And that's the way I loved you._

She frowned, listening to the lyrics. They were a bit hard to decipher over the heavy metal. She focused a bit harder, then gave up completely, bringing up a music identification program on her PDA. She flicked over to _Artists_, and gave the program cue to listen.

_Der Schnitzel Kickers._

Courtney froze. The band rang a bell. Somewhere in the back of her head. . .

Whitechapel made its way into her mind, the only thing open being a grungy punk club. Her stomach dropped and she tried to desperately shove the memory away, failing miserably. The event and the aftermath played through her mind like a movie. Courtney choked back a sob and forced herself to take a deep breath.

_That was a long time ago_, she told herself sternly. _No use in throwing a fit over it._ Scott_ is better than Duncan was. You're not set up for anything of the sort again. _The voice complied temporarily, staying quiet.

_He respects my space and never makes me wait._

_And he calls exactly when he says he will._

_He's close to my mother, talks business with my father,_

_He's charming and endearing and I'm comfortable._

Courtney stood up. She needed to go for a jog. Clear her mind. She shrugged on her jacket and grabbed her music player, putting in the earphones and slipping the device into her pocket.

The moonlight sparkled off the wet tarmac outside and the street lamps glowed pleasantly.

_But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain,_

_And it's 2am and I'm cursing your name._

_You're so in love that you act insane and that's the way I loved you._

She stepped outside into the cool evening air and inhaled deeply before setting off at a steady pace, her feet hitting the concrete path at even intervals. The occasional car sped past on the road beside her.

_This is good_, Courtney thought. _Peaceful_.

She turned a corner into the park and ran across the grass, never changing her pace. Very few people were around at this time of night, so her jog went uninterrupted.

_Breaking down and coming undone - it's a roller coaster kind of rush,_

_And I never knew I could feel that much,_

_And that's the way I loved you._

After half an hour, Courtney collapsed down on a park bench. She rubbed a crick out of her neck and rolled her arms around, breathing steadily. When she had finally deemed herself properly stretched out accordingly, she sat back, staring absently into space and thinking.

She didn't really want to be in a relationship with Scott anymore. Granted, she had liked him a bit during the All Stars season, but that was in the past now. Trying to _make_ herself like him wouldn't work. She was well and truly over him. But he didn't _know_ that.

The major problem however, was that she still liked Duncan. So damn much that it _hurt_. Scott was someone who obeyed her orders during the show with a 'Yes ma'am!', a giddy grin and a salute. He quite happily went with anything she said. Instead, Duncan brought out the rebellious side in her. He was the person that made her quite happy to break rules and have a little fun every once in a while.

Did she ever steal food with _Scott_? No. And quite frankly, she didn't go into smelly, old fish cabins for him either.

_He can't see the smile I'm faking, and my heart's not breaking,_

'_Cause I'm not feeling anything at all._

_And you were wild and crazy_

_Just so frustrating, intoxicating, complicated, got away by some mistake and now . . ._

Courtney sighed and leaned forwards, resting her elbows on her knees. Duncan was gone now. He wasn't coming back, and Courtney was going to have to deal with that.

She stood up and rolled her shoulders, gently ridding herself of the tightness in them, before turning around. She almost bowled straight into someone. She began apologising hurriedly, picking up her music player, which she had dropped.

_I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain,_

_It's 2am and I'm cursing your name._

_I'm so in love that I acted insane and that's the way I loved you._

'Princess?'

_Breaking down and coming undone - it's a roller coaster kind of rush,_

_And I never knew I could feel that much,_

_And that's the way I loved you._

_And that's the way I loved you._

Courtney's head shot up in surprise, shock, but most of all, _hope_, and she found herself staring straight into a pair of eyes. Teal ones, to be exact.

_Never knew I could feel that much,_

_And that's the way I loved you._


	6. Sad Beautiful Tragic

**Hey guys!  
**

**Another update for you (yay!) and I hope you like it. I also hope I make you sad. **

**I've been listening to the piano version of Forever and Always lately, and it's _so_ beautiful. I love it so much.**

**Okay, so I have a list of -**

***quickly references iPod***

**- 27 songs (well, 26 now, after this one), but I would still like some suggestions, plus some plots so go with them. So, crank up the reviews.**

**Also, for Courtney's apartment, imagine it kind of like Taylor's in the White Horse music video. That's sort of what I was going along the lines of, anyway.**

**Okay. So, read, review, maybe feel a bit sad, and ENJOY!  
**

**Cheers!**

**~Ice.**

* * *

_**Sad Beautiful Tragic**_

_Long handwritten note deep in your pocket._

_Words, how little they mean when you're a little too late._

Duncan collapsed onto the under stuffed couch in his cheap, run-down apartment and lazily picked up the remote, flicking on the television. Not even bothering to watch it, he rolled onto his back and stared at the cracked paint on the ceiling, noting tiny bits flaking and peeling away due to the steady pounding of the party going on next door.

The Total Drama theme song began playing, and upon recognising it, Duncan groaned and buried his face in his hands. Even after all these years, they were still doing reruns. For the public, the entertainment value was high. For him, all it did was bring back bad memories and a lot of regret. Lots of regret. For screwing everything up big time. And it was because of those screw ups, that his Princess was gone.

'_**In celebration of Total Drama's 5 year anniversary, a special episode has been put together. Now presenting: the best couples of Total Drama!'**_

Duncan groaned again. Great. Even better. He _really_ didn't need anything rubbed in at the moment.

_I stood right by the tracks, your face in a locket._

_Good girls, hopeful they'll be and long they will wait. _

Courtney sat, hunched up against the rough, brick wall of her apartment on the other side of the country. She was bundled up in a warm, overlarge jumper, tears making steady tracks down her face. The television across the room was playing, announcing quite loudly what Duncan's was also doing at the same time. Total Drama. Of course.

She buried her face into the material, which was already slightly damp from her tears. The smell of it – wood and smoke – comforted her, yet also made her want to break down completely. It was _his_ smell, after all. And _his_ jumper, too. She inhaled slowly, steadying her shaking chest.

It's going to be okay, she told herself. Even though it's been a long time, it's going to be okay, and you're going to get over it.

For some reason, that didn't work.

_We had a beautiful, magic love there._

_What a sad, beautiful, tragic love affair._

Duncan let out a steady breath, then allowed himself to look at the screen, which, _thankfully_, was currently occupied by Mike and Zoey moments. But it was going to come soon. He knew it.

And when it did, he was expecting it.

_**The Best of Duncan and Courtney**_ flashed across the screen in bright letters. And then it all began.

The moment they first met.

The day where they stole dessert from Chef's fridge and left behind a bass for him to find later.

Later that night, when she had kissed him outside of the cabin.

The challenge in TDA where Courtney had been brought back into the game, leaving Duncan completely stunned.

The Stone Age challenge where they had kissed again, before (not that he was going to admit it) he had been hammered brutally.

Brittany.

The Reunion Special, where most of the group had gone on a crazy chase in a minibus, and they had yelled about Courtney's driving skills before they (not unexpectedly) had wound up kissing again.

Total Drama World Tour, where Courtney and Gwen had bagged him in a burlap sack and carted him back into the show. What happened afterwards, he regretted big time. It was where everything had spiralled downwards.

Total Drama All Stars, where Duncan had been desperate to get her back (despite what he claimed at the time) and had been promptly dumped by Gwen because of it.

The flow of events ended here, as this was where they had both bailed out on Total Drama, giving the audience nothing else to rely on. Every interaction had been cut off from there.

_In dreams, I meet you in warm conversation._

_We both wake in lonely beds in different cities._

Courtney missed him. She wasn't even going to deny it. She missed his rebellious attitude, the way he would blatantly tell her if she was doing something wrong, the way they would fight over almost anything, but still stuck together through thick and thin. Until it hit its breaking point. Then it all fell to pieces. The way that it crumbled was intensely painful, and it had shattered her entire being when it did so. But she still missed him.

She watched through the clips on the television, and fresh tears sprung to her eyes when all of the memories hit her at once. She took a shaky breath, and tried to keep herself together. It only lasted a matter of seconds before she broke down again, this time sobbing uncontrollably. She wanted him _so _badly.

_And time is taking its sweet time erasing you,_

_And you've got your demons and, darling, they all look like me._

He had inflicted the worst damage. He knew that. And Courtney wasn't going to take him back because of it. The way she acted, the way she spoke, it wasn't like what it used to be. She wouldn't look him in the eyes anymore, like the idea of it pained her. The thought of it broke his heart, and he found himself absently staring at a spot on the floor, the feelings running though his mind like a freight train – heavy and unstoppable.

_'Cause we had a beautiful, magic love there._

_What a sad, beautiful, tragic love affair._

Courtney's eyes wandered to the phone, sitting on a table across the room. The temptation was nagging in the back of her mind, but she couldn't bring herself. He probably wouldn't even pick up. She would sit there, listening to the constant ringing until it got to the point where she couldn't bear it any more.

_Distance, timing, break down, fighting,_

_Silence, train runs off its tracks._

Duncan held his cell phone loosely in his hand. A picture of Courtney's face looked up at him, the number residing just below it. He could try. He could push just one button, and she would be at the other end, most likely screaming. But still, screaming was better than nothing. He needed to hear her voice.

_Kiss me, try to fix it, could you just try to listen?_

_Hang up, give up, for the life of us we can't get back._

Even if he did pick up, Courtney decided, he wouldn't listen to whatever she would have to say. Knowing them, they would start to fight again, and just make things a million times worse. The harshly healed wounds would reopen, making the pain fresh and immediate.

_A beautiful, magic love there,_

_What a sad, beautiful, tragic, beautiful, tragic, beautiful . . ._

His thumb hovered over the button, shaking slightly. _Just press it_. _Just press it_. He could. It was _so_ close.

He slumped back in defeat.

_What we had – a beautiful, magic love there._

_What a sad, beautiful, tragic love affair._

She continued looking at the phone through misty eyes. _Get up. You can do it._ If possible, her eyes became even more blurry, and another sob escaped her chest.

No.

_We had a beautiful, magic love there._

_What a sad, beautiful, tragic love affair._

Because the same thought ran through their minds at the same time: _I can't. _


	7. Picture To Burn

**Oh. My. God.  
It has been half a month.  
Half a freaking MONTH!  
I am _so_ sorry.**

**But, hey, this one was really hard to write. It truly did take me all of that half a month to put together. And I'm afraid it lacks the quality the rest have. So, if it's turned out like _Mine_ did, I'm sorry again.**

**But guess what?**

**I'm a beta now!**

**It is _so_ fun!**

**Anyway, please review and enjoy.**

**Cheers!**

**~Ice.**

* * *

_**Picture To Burn**_

_State the obvious, I didn't get my perfect fantasy._

_I realize you love yourself more than you could ever love me._

Courtney walked past Duncan and Gwen, who were sitting in a corner, immersed deeply in a conversation. Making an impertinent noise, she stuck her nose in the air and paraded on past, determined not to let it show how much it hurt. Being cheated on was old news to her, and it had long since set itself in solid concrete that she would never have a relationship with Duncan again. All she had to do was stop caring.

_So go and tell your friends that I'm obsessive and crazy,_

_That's fine, I'll tell mine you're gay._

The battle to be the more dominant human being had already begun. So, according to Duncan, she was now a "crazy, stuck up Little-Miss-C.I.T" while he was a "Neanderthal with the brain capacity of a goldfish". Which was completely true.

Anyway, the point was, they were completely over. And they hated each other now, so to speak. All of her past hopes were under the wheels of the bulldozer.

_By the way . . ._

_I hate that stupid old pickup truck you never let me drive._

_You're a redneck heartbreak who's really bad at lying._

They both looked up from their conversation at her; Duncan gave her a look of disdain whilst Gwen looked immensely guilty. Not that she cared. Courtney only spared them a glance out of the corner of her eye, but kept her nose in the air. She was above these . . . these _people_. Not that they would count as that to begin with. Humph.

'Do you need something, _Courtney_?' Duncan asked, his voice low.

'No,' she spat back immediately. 'But why would you help me even if I did?'

He shrugged, looking particularly unamused. 'Beats me.'

She rolled her eyes, muttered a few choice curses and stalked off to the plane confessional. She could vent her frustration in there.

_So watch me strike a match on all my wasted time,_

_As far as I'm concerned you're just another picture to burn. _

_**Confessional:**_ 'And he's just so irritating, and stupid, and horrible, and that eyebrow ring . . . _ugh_, and . . . and . . .'

Courtney broke off from her sentence, trying to think about something else insulting to say. But she had been ranting for twenty minutes straight, and she was starting to run out of material without repeating herself. And before she could stop herself, she had burst into tears.

Someone hammered on the door. 'Are you done in there yet, Drama Queen?' Heather yelled. 'Some of us need the confessional too, you know!'

Courtney grumbled, and looked up at the camera with red eyes. 'Fine. I'll come back later.'

She got to her feet and pushed open the door, shoving her way past Heather without really looking.

_There's no time for tears, I'm just sitting here planning my revenge._

_There's nothing stopping me from going out with all of your best friends,_

_And if you come around saying sorry to me, my daddy's gonna show you how sorry you'll be._

As she made her way along the hallway, she regained her composure. Revenge was what she needed. She couldn't believe it had taken so long to occur to her. And besides, Alejandro had mentioned it earlier. It seemed an alright idea.

Her thoughts flashed back to Tyler. Maybe . . . No. She had already tried that, and it wasn't working. Besides, he had already been eliminated in the Area 52 challenge. So he was out of the question. But flirting with Alejandro had also benefited the both of them; Duncan had looked extremely brassed off by it, and Heather (though she kept on denying it) was obviously jealous. Flirting was evidently a fantastic move.

'_Cause I hate that stupid old pickup truck you never let me drive._

_You're a redneck heartbreak who's really bad at lying._

Courtney shrugged inwardly to herself. No matter what way she went about revenge, everyone she hated was just going to get voted off, anyway. Because when she came into this season, she came in to win. Not like she was going to pass that up.

_So watch me strike a match on all my wasted time,_

_As far as I'm concerned, you're just another picture to burn. _

She opened the door to a supply room and sat down on the floor in the middle of it, surrounded by props, tools, and the smell of cleaning fluid. If she was going to plot, she could plot in secret. Holding back a small smile, she pulled a notepad and pen from her pocket and began jotting down ideas.

_And if you're missing me, you'd better keep it to yourself,_

_'Cause coming back around here would be bad for your health . . ._

Courtney paused in her vicious writing spree, looking up slowly, a thought dawning upon her. She _knew_ Duncan. She knew his inner workings, the way he reacted to situations, and how long his interest lasted depending on the matter. And she _knew_ what was going to happen.

At some point – she didn't know when – but at _some_ point, he was going to lose interest in Gwen. And after that, he was either going to find someone new or . . . he would want Courtney back. And Courtney had a strong feeling that it was going to be the latter. He was probably going to realise the mistake he had made, and he was either going to try and win her back or make her quote-unquote "jealous", thinking that she would be the one to come to him.

See, she knew him so well, she could tell the future.

_'Cause I hate that stupid old pickup truck you never let me drive._

_You're a redneck heartbreak who's really bad at lying._

Well, this was where his thinking fails. Courtney was _not_ going back to him. Not now, not ever. And he was going to deal with that and realise that he will never have her again.

He was going to have to find another girl.

A girl that was going to tolerate him.

She burst out laughing.

_Yeah, good luck with that, Duncan_, she thought.

_So watch me strike a match on all my wasted time - in case you haven't heard,_

_I really, really hate that stupid old pickup truck you never let me drive._

He was screwed. Royally. Screwed. She had his future mapped out now, and it wasn't pretty. She began ticking off her list:

1) No love interest or future partner

2) No family or means of financial support (as _if_ his parents were going to help him out of this one)

3) No job (Duncan? _Working?_ She had another laughing fit at that)

4) No. Courtney.

The fourth one was crucial. He simply wasn't going to get through life without her. And damn, whenever that was going to finally occur to him, she knew it was going to _burn_.

_You're a redneck heartbreak who's really bad at lying._

_So watch me strike a match on all my wasted time,_

_As far as I'm concerned you're just another picture to burn._

She sat back, a contented and slightly giddy grin on her face.

_Burn, burn, burn, baby burn._

_Just another picture to burn._

Oh, revenge was _sweet_.

_Baby burn . . ._


	8. The Last Time

**I wrote this all tonight. **

***smiles tiredly***

**I hope it's up to scratch.**

**Suggestions are still more than welcome. I really need some plots. Otherwise I may accidentally repeat myself.**

**Also, I just want you to know that I'm not going to update until I get some reviews.**

**Cheers! *yawn***

**~Ice.**

* * *

_**The Last Time**_

_I find myself at your door, just like all those times before,_

_I'm not sure how I got there, all roads—they lead me here._

Duncan's hand hovered just over the door handle. He felt hesitant to open it, but coming here was from sheer instinct alone. Coming to _her._

Yes, they were back together. Again. Cue the gasping. But they still fought. Duncan had thought all of their previous issues had already been dealt with after all of the time they spent on the show, but he had been proven wrong.

He didn't know _why_ he kept starting the fights. Maybe he just felt that he needed to, and did it impulsively. Very few times they parted with a kiss, but for the majority, their meetings ended with Courtney in tears. He was still hurting her.

_I imagine you are home, in your room, all alone,_

_And you open your eyes into mine, and everything feels better._

He rested his hand on the handle, turning it gently. He pushed the door open. The inside of the apartment was completely dark, so he flicked on the light switch, walking into the lounge room. Princess was curled up on the couch, wrapped up in a quilt, her eyes blank. She didn't even flinch as he remembered the door, turning back around to close it, but turning off the light. Having walked this floor so many times, he navigated his way back to the couch with ease.

_And right before your eyes, I'm breaking, _

_No past, no reasons why,_

_Just you and me . . ._

He sat down next to Courtney and pulled her into his side, wrapping his arms around her. He was glad for the dark, as she could not see his eyes beginning to shimmer. He was supposed to be tougher than this, but the pure need to be holding her had overwhelmed him. He felt her head, which was resting on his chest, move slightly as she spoke.

'You came back.' Her voice was a harsh whisper, obviously from the lack of use.

He didn't know what to say, so he stayed quiet and hoped that she figured something out from his silence.

_This is the last time I'm asking you this; put my name at the top of your list._

_This is the last time I'm asking you why you break my heart in the blink of an eye, eye, eye . . ._

Within the hour, they were fighting again. The light was now turned on, and they were screaming so loud that the occupant in the apartment next door actually hammered on the wall, yelling for them to keep quiet. They both ignored them, of course.

'Why do you have to be so uptight all the time?'

'Why won't you ever listen to me?_'_

'Why don't _you_ ever listen to _me?'_

'Why do you have to treat me so badly?' Those last few words cracked in Courtney's mouth, and more tears traced their way down her cheeks. '_Why?_'

_You find yourself at my door, just like all those times before,_

_You wear your best apology, but I was there to watch you leave._

He had come again, right when she finally thought he had left for good. That's all he really seemed to be good at; coming back. It had to stop. She had been broken too much.

'It's over. For good, this time. Get out.'

Duncan froze, mid-rant. 'What?'

'I said, _get out!_' Her voice rose to a hysterical scream, and with a glare, Duncan shoved open the door and stormed out. He was gone. Again. And for the last time.

_And all the times I let you in, just for you to go again,_

_Disappear when you come back, everything is better._

She collapsed back down onto the couch and burst into full-blown tears. It hurt. Too. Damned. Much. He was always picking fights with her, and being the argumentative person she was, she couldn't help snapping back. It was like he wanted her to feel the way she did. But she was hanging on. She knew somewhere deep down that he loved her, and she loved him too. She was just going to admit it more readily than he was.

_And right before your eyes, I'm aching, _

_No past, nowhere to hide,_

_Just you and me . . ._

Somewhere deep inside of her, something was telling her she did the right thing, letting him go. She wasn't sure if she entirely believed that, not when she still felt she needed him. Desperately. Uncontrollably.

She wasn't sure what her emotions were actually trying to tell her. Whether it was to take him back, if he ever returned, or to turn him away. She was so _confused_.

_This is the last time I'm asking you this; put my name at the top of your list._

_This is the last time I'm asking you why you break my heart in the blink of an eye, eye, eye . . ._

Days passed. Those days soon turned into weeks. And when a full month rolled around, Duncan had finally realised his mistake. Courtney was gone. For good, now.

With a yell of anger, he punched the brick wall of his apartment, not even caring when the skin covering his knuckles split and blood spilled over his hand. He punched it again, leaving a bloody mark on the wall.

He was such an insensitive _arse._

_This is the last time you tell me I've got it wrong._

Courtney was beginning to finally make up her mind. He had been hurting her too much; a pain, despite what her heart was telling her, she was better off without.

_This is the last time I say it's been you all along._

He was telling her that she had the problems; the issues. But that wasn't the truth. He had been giving her lies that, if she hadn't been so upset by everything he was doing, she would have realised weren't true.

_This is the last time I let you in my door._

She wasn't sure she could ever trust him again. She would have to see him, really, to know. She would have to look at him, read his intentions. She couldn't do that when he wasn't here.

_This is the last time, I won't hurt you anymore._

He shouldn't be doing this. He shouldn't be hurting her any more than he had. But he couldn't stop himself; like he already knew, going to her was an impulsive instinct. He had to tell her he was sorry.

_This is the last time I'm asking you this; put my name at the top of your list._

She still loved him. That was never going to change. It was something she was never going to ever get over.

_This is the last time I'm asking you why you break my heart in the blink of an eye._

He _did_ love her. He always had. But he had never admitted it, and that was where everything fell apart. He had been too afraid to say so. He didn't want to feel vulnerable, and so he had hurt her instead. That was something his was never going to forgive himself for, let alone expect her to. He just needed to tell her he was sorry. That was all.

_This is the last time I'm asking you, last time I'm asking you, last time I'm asking you this._

She still cried, even after all this time. Part of her didn't know why, while the other part understood fully. It was something that couldn't be put into words.

_This is the last time I'm asking you, last time I'm asking you, last time I'm asking you this._

He took the stairs up to her apartment, for perhaps the last time. He pushed open the door as he had done so many times before, and she was already there, standing before him with red eyes.

'What are you doing here?' she asked, quietly.

'I'm sorry,' he whispered back. 'For everything. For hurting you. Doing what I did – it's the worst thing I could ever do.'

She nodded slowly.

'Okay,' she murmured after a moment. 'But what do you want?'

'To tell you that I love you. And I was a jerk not to tell you before.'

'And you want another chance.'

Once again, he hoped that she read it all from his silence

_This is the last time I'm asking you, last time I'm asking you, last time I'm asking you this._

She walked into him and let him wrap his arms around her, pressing a kiss to her forehead. 'The last time,' she whispered.

_This is the last time I'm asking you, last time I'm asking you, last time I'm asking you this . . ._


End file.
